SCHOOL!

I usually write these things at night after my kiddos are asleep, but I'm trying to squeeze this one in before dinner. so bear with me. The only exciting thing happening is the count-down to school starting. It starts Sept 8, and my kids are very excited. what an amazing adventure it will be for them! both will be going this year and that makes me a little excited. I like to think about that 2 hours I will get with just me and belle. what on earth will I do with this time? I could read and play one-on-one with belle for as long as she will let me (shes been miss independent lately), then who knows? grocery shopping? start a new workout routine? re-organize, de-clutter, paint, and re-decorate the entire house? the possibilities are endless when you only have one well- behaved child to look after. when you chase toddlers around the house all day for 4 years, the sudden absence of the task can be a little disorienting. Then I remember back to the days when it was just brennon. I felt like I couldn't get anything accomplished! how could I possibly watch a child and do anything else at the same time? looking back, he probably thought I was pretty annoying, being all up in his space all the time. I ran behind him with a pillow and a broom, so to speak. wow how times have changed!! I can do just about anything, with three, so I'm jumping up and down with excitement (on the inside) with the thought of what I can accomplish with one. Armed with the parenting knowledge I have now, Belle and I can take on the world. One errand at a time. My older darlings have been asking every day if its time for school yet. apparently they cant wait to get away from me. No doubt about it, that means they are growing up. They don't need mommy as much anymore, they're going to be busy meeting new people and learning that they have their own little lives. (i know, i know, it preschool. not college. but it still feels the same!) and that is super depressing. I know I will be a nervous wreck while they're at school. They go to a wonderful pre-school, but I just worry about typical mom stuff. are they going to behave? are they going to get picked on? are they going to learn anything? are they going to do something incredibly embarrassing (for me, not them)? So even though I am dreaming about all this 'free' time, I will probably cry my eyes out when i drop them off, and watch the clock every second until its time to pick them up (which i will do 30 minutes early. just in case, you know, they NEED me earlier.) Chances are, we will all do just fine. so I will try my best to enjoy it and let them enjoy it. because before I know it, they'll be in high school. then none of us will be happy ;p

how much should we care about people who dont care?

wow! what a week. a long one, but a good one. finally got school shopping done, thanks to kids closet!! they're amazing. if  you haven't been to a sale, you should go. I guess I was a little bummed that we don't have the money to buy the kids ALL NEW clothing in the newest styles, but it was a great deal! and the clothes were barely used and super cute. and my DD puts on dresses with snow boots/mittens and butterfly wings. so I know they don't care. Oh and Brennons birthday was fantastic! he played and ate and ripped paper until he dropped. I didn't get to do the dinosaur theme he was hoping for, but I found a really cute sports themed set on clearance. I was totally bummed about not getting him the Dino theme due to "funding" issues. But as it turned out, he was very impressed with all the sports decor and the cake/cupcakes I made for him. and you know, I don't think he would really care either way. As long as he got cake and presents and got to play, he didn't have a care in the world. I SOOOO wish I could adapt to his way of thinking! I've been focusing on the negative instead of the positive, and I HATE that. I was furious that members of his family didn't send him a birthday card, even though he couldn't care less. I was irritated with the low turnout at the party, even though the people that were there made it AMAZING. and again, he didn't care. he was beyond ecstatic to be able to play with the kids that made it. don't get me wrong, it was a great party and I had just as much fun as Brennon, but I couldn't shake that nagging feeling. just like today, we took the kiddos to the MO fair ( it was military appreciation day, we only to pay 1$ !!) and of course it was crowded as all get-out. we tried to go to several of the shows/events- but when we got there, it was so crowded that there wasn't even standing room and we couldn't see a thing. but do you think any of the very-well-fed-looking fair goers taking up an entire bleacher with their behinds would scooch a bit so my kids could see? shooooot NO! we got dirty looks for trying to squeeze in. I mean hello? you're adults with no kids and you're guarding your vantage point for the piggy races like its your only mission on this good earth. get a life! sheesh! anyway, I got to thinking... you know... I would probably have had a better time if I didn't let that one thing get to me. instead of focusing on that, I should of thought of how SUPER NICE that little elderly gentleman was who stopped and listened to brennon tell him all about god-knows-what. and he listened to brennon with such rapt attention that you woulda thought he was telling him the secret to life. but instead I just muttered a "sorry... " (I don't know why I assume strangers are annoyed by my kids, I feel bad now ) and hustled my them onto the next activity. so why do we care so much about when people don't care? yet when people do, we just expect it and don't think anything of it. Are we really so jaded that we cant appreciate the simple things? if the answer is yes, then that's pretty darn sad. and I don't want my little ones to grow up that way. so if the kids don't have a problem with it, then neither do I! I have stop fighting battles for them that they don't even know exist. I'm going to let go and let god handle my issues. Because believe me, Hes the only one that can handle 'em!

boys, birthdays, and big glasses of lemonade.

Okay, so whats been up lately.... a lot. My master cleanse is over, unfortunately I didn't make it ten days. let me explain what its like. the first couple of days are the worst. the first day, i had terrible migraines and i was SUPER crabby. DH was on my last nerve (and I on his) and the kids were scared to talk to me. NOT a good day. the next day wasn't so bad and it kept getting better from there. i cheated a couple of times (for shame!) but i drank the required amount of lemonade mixture and i could tell it was working. as soon as I started eating food again, my stomach felt like i swallowed hot boiling acid. it was terrible. and NO, i didn't 'ease out' like i should have, and maybe that's the reason. I also started breaking out and getting a flare (eczema) the day i started eating again. could be a coincidence, but i think not. but at least I know what NOT to do next time. and there WILL be a next time, I WILL finish the 10 days and then some. I got some interest from a few other ladies, and maybe the next time i will have someone try it with me. it wont be so bad if i have support. I know its not meant to be a weight loss aid, but i would be lying if i said i didn't hope to lose some serious L.B's. this freaking plateau I'm on is getting really old, and fat. anyway, my little bros were in town recently as well. I love when they visit, i feel like I'm missing out on their lives by living so far away. they're 10 and 12 years younger than me, and they were pretty young when i left home, so we don't really get to 'grow up together' like most siblings. anyway, brennon was so excited! he loves his uncles so much. and i appreciate the fact that they genuinely love spending time with him and the other kids. which is more than I can say for other members of their family. but that's another story. My dad and his girlfriend Debbie surprised him by visiting on his actual birthday, and he thought that was the best gift ever. Dad surprised me by giving me a antique vanity that he refurbished. its beautiful! i love old fashioned things. so overall its been a pretty good week, looking forward to brennons party this Saturday. I love having people over, especially when it is for such a sweet occasion! hope to see y'all there :)